“He knows my heart” doesn’t cut it anymore

I am going to be honest.  I am amazed at people who really believe there is no God.  I have a million questions that run through my head when confronted with their position because I want to know how they came to that kind of conclusion.  For some it is because of their upbringing and for others it is, according to them, their rational thinking.  No matter how you feel about the subject, it is their life and their right to believe that their is no God.

The ones that really amaze me though are the ones that have tasted His goodness, experienced His amazing grace, been transformed by His peace, and still choose to walk in darkness.  I amaze myself….I thought I could keep living the life I wanted, ignoring the convictions of the Holy Spirit, rationalize my wrongdoings telling myself “You are a good person, God forgives…He doesn’t expect you to give that up or stop doing that, He knows how hard it is for you and how much you love Him….He knows your heart…he knows your heart…he knows your heart..” That phrase always repeated itself in my head.  He did know my heart and I think that was the hardest thing to swallow for me as I continued to sin against my Creator, my Savior.  The more I ran, the more my feet got heavier.  The more I sinned, the more my heart got heavier.  The more I fought His will, the more my life got messier.

I share these things because I know we all share the same battlefield but are fighting different battles within our lives.  Those of us who are believers but have fallen back into our old lifestyle are still saved, but have not allowed Him to truly transform our lives and have not completely surrendered our will to Him.  I realized this after 20+ yrs of calling myself a Christian.  There are some of us who have refused to accept the call of Jesus because you think God doesn’t have your best interest at heart so we try to do it ourselves.  Let me tell you….you ARE His heart! Isaiah 48:17 states “I am the Lord your God, who teaches what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go.” Many of us, including myself have rejected his direction for my life.  I actually began to believe that God’s way will not work out to my advantage in the end. I found myself actually rejecting the love of God and wisdom of His will for my life and placed my own agenda above His and it almost cost me everything precious I held dear.

I earnestly pray that if you are facing the same battle that you submit, yes, submit and surrender yourself to Him.  I encourage you to approach the throne of grace with confidence and with an understanding that even when His will is hard, it really will lead to the best possible outcome for you.  He always has your best interest at heart and even though we may not understand it at the particular moment in our lives, you will look back and understand what all that heartache and disobedience was about…and then there are times we will never know, but must trust His faithfulness and goodness in everything! Some may think that kind of lifestyle is foolish, niave, or just plain stupid, but I think living a lifestyle like there isn’t a God or that there is, but you just don’t care is as dangerous, wreckless, and prideful…the difference between the two lifetstyles….one is redeemed and one is redeemable….choose wisely my friends!

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